Diddle what?

One of my favorite poems when I was knee high to a rug rat, more or less.
Was:

Hey diddle diddle,
The cat and the fiddle,
The cow jumped over the moon.
The little dog laughed,
To see such fun,
And the dish ran away with the spoon.

This little nifty rhyme may date back to at least the sixteenth century. There is a reference all the way back to a play, by a dude named Thomas Preston.  It wasn’t a happy show.  A tragedy in fact… albeit mixed with “pleasant mirth.”

Pleasant Mirth.  Who doesn’t need a little heap of pleasant mirth every now and again?   It was about the King of Persia and was printed in 1569 . It went…
They be at hand Sir with stick and fidle;
 They can play a new dance called hey-didle-didle.

Yet.  We know it better by the “Cat and the Fiddle.”  Which, by the way… was a very common name for Inns & Pubs in England and thereabouts.  “Where ya’ staying tonight Ian?  Oh… down at the Cat and the Fiddle.”   And all we Americans could come up was Motel 6.

So.  Back to it. The earliest recorded version of the poem (as we know it) was printed in London in Mother Goose’s Melody around 1765.  And you know THOSE lyrics:
Hey diddle diddle, blah, blah, blah, blah…

There have been a  lot of theories about its origin  and its meaning.  Everything from  the corruption of ancient Greece,  to its connection to various constellations…  most significantly Taurus.  Maybe that’s why I like that diddy so dang much.  It has Taurus written all over it.    There are a dozen other theories… from an account of  Lady Katherine Grey, and her sordid relationships; to Catholic Priests asking for people to work harder;  or even a story about Catherine, the wife of Peter the Great.

But I am here to break it down for you. KW Style.

Hey diddle diddle,
(This refers to Mother Goose, the author, losing bladder control in later years of life… she would diddle, diddle).

The cat and the fiddle,
(This is a call for the stop of abuse of animals.  Specifically, using animals in side shows… and freak of nature tricks.  Like David Letterman’s Stupid Pet Tricks … and America’s Got Talent.  Mother Goose saw it coming.  She wanted it to stop way back then.)

The cow jumped over the moon.
(This really happened.  It will take another whole article to tell you this story.  The important thing to remember here is the truth.  The bear was not at fault.  It was the small grouping of mice with the Yard Darts Game who were to blame.  The cow ended up being mostly okay, but she emotionally, was never quite right again.  And the moon is still hanging in the sky. Thank god for that.)

The little dog laughed,
To see such fun,
(This really happened too.  Immediately following the cow jumping over the moon incident.  What little dog wouldn’t laugh?)

And the dish ran away with the spoon. 
(This is in reference to the missing cake in the refrigerator.  In the Goose household, Granny Goose couldn’t finish her dessert most nights following dinner. Of course the Goose Family would say… “Granny-O, we will put that up for you in there icebox. You can retrieve it later, at will, and eat it when your belly is hungry.”  So pathetically, time after time, Granny would go to the fridge for her leftover Lemon Custard Apple Tart Cake.  And it would be GONE.  She would wobble to the living room, where the family was watching Lawrence Welk reruns… and demand… “WHERE is my cake?”

“Why Granny.  Wouldn’t you know… it left town with the glass of milk … and the dish ran away with the spoon.”

Now you know. So you can sleep tonight.

And.  You’re Welcome.