Apparently, the Diverticulitis Demons, also known as Gut Goblins, do not care for Holidays in general. Particularly Christmas.
There is a huge history behind this. It dates back to the 1555, when Rudolph II first recognized the disease. Well. Maybe. You see. Rudolf II was one of the most eccentric rulers of the European Renaissance. He liked to collect things. A lot of things. He was also a HUGELY enthusiastic patron of the arts, sciences and pseudo-sciences.
Rudy. Prague-Man. Yep. His castle complex at Prague featured a vast menagerie of animals, including lions, tigers, an orangutan and a live dodo bird. He also had a “cabinet of curiosities” included a dizzying array of human and natural artifacts, organized by genre. Like… body parts. A to Z.
And the dude liked to eat. Me too. But he was a little obsessed with any gastric afflictions. Like the old Diverticulitis… before it was called that. It was named Brute Bowel. It was believed to be caused by Gut Goblins. You had to offer them gifts to ward them off. No gifts? You IN BIG TROUBLE.
I know this one to be true.
Another little note on this guy. He was a bit eccentric. Or in tune. Depending on how you see it. Throughout his life Rudolf alternated between bouts of elation and melancholy. Most likely… Bipolar.
As a ruler, he would withdraw from court from weeks on end, or speak in an inaudible voice. Talk to the hand, I guess.
But for all his quirkiness… he did a lot of great things for arts and sciences. He gave generous support to the astronomers Tycho Brahe and Johannes Kepler. Of course… this helped lay the foundation of the Scientific Revolution.
So basically, as one historian put it…. Rudolf… had a willingness to believe almost everything. Both a blessings, and a curse. Rudolf was an equally enthusiastic supporter of astrologers, alchemists and mystics. Of all kinds.
As you can see, this all dates back 500 years ago. Those Gut Goblins. Christmas. It is all interconnected on this Merry-Go-Round. Since I was sick the entire month of December, I did not do much in the way of gift-shopping. And I did not buy foot-pajamas for the Gut Goblins. They became angry.
So the day after Christmas, they started to sneak up on me. And now, they are in full-control, once again. I have contacted my Current-Day-Sorcerer… also known as my family doctor. And tonight I am back on meds and rest.
I sat down at my computer to tell you that I wouldn’t be writing tonight, because I’m not feeling good… but apparently… the delirium is making me chatty. So, there you have it.
I should have bought the footy-pajamas…. no matter what. X-Large footies… as Goblins are directly related to Trolls. And we all know how big Troll feet can be. But I dropped the ball… and now I’m not having a ball. So until later… Be well. I’ll hopefully… be well too.
― Margaret Mitchell
― Alexander Pope