I have come to hate ads on the internet. Yes. I know hate is a bad word. A strong word. One we should use carefully, IF at all.
It is when we feel intense or passionate dislike for someone…. OR… if we have a strong aversion to something.
Now sometimes, we even use it politely when we express our regret… or even our embarrassment. Like…. “Ohhhh, I really hate to bother you.”
But back to ads on the internet. I have to call them like I see them. I have grown, GROWN & GROAN, to hate that advertising. Because… I see it everywhere.
It used to be, back when the internet was just a baby, that the occasional little box ad would appear in a sidebar, on the right of your page. It may have been butt-ugly, but it just sat there…. off to the right.
It would be akin to going into a restaurant, and passing a drunk guy, slouched on a stool, in the bar area, as you made your way to the table. You were sorry he was there, but honestly, it didn’t matter much one way or the other. He was just sitting there. Off to the right.
Oh my goodness. How things have changed. Now they are everywhere. And obnoxiously everywhere.
This morning, I was reading an article on the Wisconsin Primary results at a site called “The Hill”…. when the entire page slid down off the screen…. and into my view came a Ford Hefty-Boy Pick-up Truck. It was rolling toward me over big lumpy dirty and lots of boulders. After a short second, I found the neatly camouflaged “close” button, and shut ‘er down.
But here is the thing. I don’t want a Ford Truck. At all. I don’t roll over lumpy dirt and big boulders. And even if I did, I’d probably buy a foreign-made SUV, because they are much better quality.
Now. Let’s revisit the restaurant scene. This ad is the equivalent of the drunk guy, leaping off his bar stool, running out the front door, tackling me, puking in my face, and then trying to further keep me from going into the restaurant and having dinner.
I hate internet ads.
Tonight, as I “surfed” around the Internet Sea, I just wanted to gather a few examples. It took very little time. The first article I tried to access was completely obliterated with pop-ups, slide-by’s and video blasts. I fell off my “surf” board at least a half a dozen times before I found the right wave.
I know we have to expect it. I mean, the internet if this HUGE and infinite pool of information. Not only that…. but we can buy and sell everything from underwear to race cars; we can book our trips, go to the doctor, watch our movies, conduct our business, find a Psychic, and see our grand babies who live in Madrid.
All of this proudly brought to you by our sponsors.
Which brings me to this. My Great Grandma Matilda Hoffenbracher used to say… “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” Sooooooo…. Heeeerrrreeeee wheeeee gooooooo…….
Kid Wednesday Hot Pads. I heard some of you were burning pots… or was it smoking pots? Some of you were hoping they’d make smoking pots legal in Ohio? I cook all the time, and never burn up my pots. Nonetheless…. Kid Wednesday Pot Holders are now available! Because I care.
